The Myth of Balance

By Heather Lopez

One of the most common questions I get asked is, “How do you balance it all?” The answer: I don’t.  I was talking about this with my new friend Vicky, who runs a conference called Inspiration U. We were working on topic ideas for a potential speaking opportunity at her event, and we both realized how often people mistake balance for priority.

Vicky stated that the word Balance implies that you have an equal allotment to each part, which when you think about it, is both unrealistic and nonsensical. We both came to the conclusion that balance was a myth i.e. something that people talk about as if it is real, but it doesn’t really exist.

Show me someone who claims to have it all figured out and I will show you a liar, or at least someone in denial. You see, we want to put our best foot forward in the world, so we fear sharing the times when we “fall off.” But, everybody does.

When I thought about the concept of balance, I also began to realize why people kept asking me how I do it. People have  perception of me as a mom entrepreneur juggling multiple responsibilities, and I have been successful at providing the illusion of having balance. But if you knew me, you’d know that I am resilient, not balanced.  I get back up on the horse, every time I fall off.  You can have a routine, but there are always those unexpected occurrences that can catch you off guard.  Being resilient means being able to bounce back from the setbacks and overcome the obstacles.

So let’s go back to the idea of priority. When you go through prioritization, you decide what is most important to you and what is
the most time sensitive, and then create a plan for your actions. Prioritization can be a daily process to help you stay focused on what’s important.  With this concept, you are not obligated to keep things equal and you take care of what is most important first.

One of the speakers for my conferences, Mike Michalowicz of The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur fame, offered a very useful post that helped me with prioritizing my business time. The basic summary of the idea was that you:

1. Get a piece of paper and make two columns.
2. On one column you write TASK and the other column, you put TYPE.
3. Then you write down all of your tasks as they come into your mind under TASK.
4. Next, in the type column, you put a $ sign next to all of the tasks that will generate income in the next 30 days.
5. Then you put a next to the tasks that will make your clients happy.
6. Take care of tasks with both symbols first.
7. Then take care of tasks with the  symbol.
8. The take care of the tasks with $ symbol.
9. The tasks with no symbol can be moved back.

You can find the full post here:  http://www.toiletpaperentrepreneur.com/managing-focus/do-more-stuff-in-less-time

That helps with the business prioritization, but what about the rest of it? Of course, your business is not your entire life, so how do you go about prioritizing your life too? Well, the first priority should be You.  As a mom, we get so used to self-sacrifice that we put our own needs aside. However, if the donkey is sick, who is going to pull the cart? Happy Moms breed Happy Homes. Make sure you are getting at least 15 minutes of Me Time every day, doing whatever it is you want to do.

After that, if you are involved in a meaningful relationship, you need to focus on providing time for your partner or spouse. If you are so busy that neither of you have time for each other, eventually the communication will break down and the closeness will dissipate. Make time each day to show that special someone how they are important to you.

From there, you prioritize your kids’ needs. Don’t overschedule them. There is a difference between being in band, and being in band, basketball, football, chorus, etc. Let the children gravitate towards an area that they would like to focus on. This will hel them maintain focus later on in life. I, myself, was one of those kids who was in dance, cheerleading, band, chorus, basketball swimming, yearbook, etc….. Look at me now, finding it virtually impossible not to be doing 10 different things simultaneously.  I might’ve have benefitted from some focused direction earlier on.

Then you have everything else like your extended family, friends, etc. Now, you might disagree with me on the order, but that i your personal priorities. You decide what order suits you the most and then decide what you will take care of first each day.

I don’t balance, I prioritize. I am not balanced, I am resilient. For more tips & support prioritizing your life, try out The Mom Entrepreneur Support Group (we’ve got a 30 day trial).

Heather Lopez, aka The Social Commerce Mom, specializes in relationship marketing both online and off.  She is the new owner of The Mom Entrepreneur® & the CEO of Heather Lopez Enterprises LLC, where she is responsible for several events, websites, trainings, and services targeting moms and those seeking to market to moms. Heather empowers moms to create their own financial freedom through business or blogging so that they may have more time for what they treasure most. She is also a 30-something mom to two rambunctious toddlers and wife to one entrepreneurial-minded husband.  You can connect with Heather @ http://www.HeatherLopezEnterprises.com   

Tags: Balancing Business and Babies, Balancing kids and a business, Inspiration University, mom entrepreneurs, The Myth of Balance, The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur

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The Mom Entrepreneur Co-op Shop now accepting new members for its 9/15 launch. Early bird pricing ends 9/5

Tags: holiday shopping, mom entrepreneurs, online marketplace, shopping for busy moms

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Is the name of your company limiting your marketability?

Recently, I was listening to the 80′s channel on Sirius Radio and heard a very pretty song that I did not recognize. I was actually shocked that I did not recognize the song or the name of the group since I consider myself very savvy about music from the 80′s.

Martha Quinn the host, and famous 80′s DJ, came on the radio after the song ended and asked if listeners knew why they had not heard more from Bourgeious Tagg. She explained that they quickly faded from the spotlight and their song, ‘I don t mind at all’ was considered a one-hit wonder. The group’s name was too hard to remember and so they could not be easily found online or in record stores, she explained.

This made me think about mom entrepreneurs starting businesses or struggling to grow one. Very few people might not realize that the name of their company may be limiting their marketability.

Entrepreneur.com says that making your business name so obscure, customers will never know what it means, is a mistake.

It’s great for a name to have a special meaning or significance–it sets up a story that can be used to tell the company message. But if the reference is too obscure or too hard to spell and pronounce, you may never have the opportunity to speak to that customer because they’ll simply pass you by as irrelevant.

What’s the best way for start-up entrepreneurs to approach the challenge of finding the perfect business name? In an article for Microsoft Office Live Small Business, Sarah Van Dyck, managing director for Seattle-based Modo Group, and strategic branding adviser to top Fortune 500 consumer and technology companies, recommends keeping it simple.

“A company name, by itself, can’t stand for everything that a company represents,” she says. “The best approach is to select a name that is memorable, own-able, and can stand out in a specific business category.”

Picking a name for your start up or growing and changing company should be taken very seriously. This is an important exercise, and mom entrepreneurs should spend time crafting and developing a company name until they get the right combination of words to fit what they do, and that the target market will respond to.

“A great name is the beginning of a great brand,” says Scott Allen, author of the article How to Create a Great Business Name. He suggests many tips for finding the perfect company name.

Tip # 1 Brainstorm. Think about how you want people to feel when they hear the name. Write down the words on paper and then categorize them by primary meaning.

Tip #4 Experiment. Start playing with combinations of your various words and partial words. Don’t be judgmental now – just make a list.

Tip # 5 Reflect. Review your list and just give some thought to each name. How does it make you feel when you hear it?

Tip #6 Communicate. Go over the list with someone you trust. Have them tell you how each name makes them feel, and how memorable they think it is.

Tip #9 Check domain names. You want to make sure that an appropriate domain name is available. You want YourCompanyName.com, of course. If that’s not available, you may want to reconsider.

AllBusiness.com advises Get your name right the first time.

If you do not choose your name carefully, you may be requested or required to change it, which will require changing your domain name, obtaining new listings in telephone and other directories, and purchasing new stationary, in addition to other unpleasant renaming tasks. Best to do your homework and get the name right the first time. There are two good reasons for this: Your business will be identified by its name and you will (hopefully) be living with the name for a long time.

So in order to avoid being a “one-hit wonder” or “fly by night business”, do your homework, talk to your target market, conduct research and create a winning name that will be the start of a memorable brand.

Tags: growing a company, marketability, mom entrepreneurs, starting a company

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“Where Do You Work Naked?” Contest

Is your home office located in a tree house, playhouse or refurbished warehouse? Do you work in a funky, functional or fabulous spare bedroom, basement or attic home office? If so, you and your home office could win the “Where Do You Work Naked?” Contest sponsored by workingnaked.net between March 15-April 15, 2010.

Whether you work from home full-time, part-time or to occupy time, the place where you work naked—without the support of the corporate workplace—could earn you these prizes:

• Elfa products from The Container Store ($250 value)
• Fellowes PS-79Ci Cross-Cut 100% Jam Proof Shredder
• Epson WorkForce 610
• Library edition binders from Russell + Hazel
• Home Office Solutions: Creating a Space that Works for You book by Lisa Kanarek
• One-year subscription to Flexjobs
• Official “I’m working naked…are you?” t-shirt

For more details visit  www.workingnaked.net.

Tags: home office, mom entrepreneurs, WAHM, work at home mom, working naked

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